Meet a Hummingbird... Susan

As a family, we all moved to Fernhurst in West Sussex in 2017. My daughter and her husband had been living in London but didn’t want to bring up their boys there. We’re very close as a family, and so my husband and I decided to move from our home in Kent too, together with my mum, Sheila, and my aunty.

My mum is living with dementia. As the condition progressed, it became clear that I couldn’t keep caring for her myself. She wanted to come to a Christian home and that’s when we found Shottermill House. Mum moved in about six years ago.

I started volunteering at Shottermill House during Covid. With all the visiting restrictions, this was a lovely way I could continue to see Mum, as well as get to know all the other members of the home.

One day I was asked if I’d consider taking on the role of Hummingbird. I love being with people and so I decided to give it a go.

As a Hummingbird, I get alongside family members, particularly those living with dementia. I’ll hold someone’s hand when they are sad. Sometimes it’s not about talking, it’s about being there and giving them a stroke and saying, “It’s going to be okay”.

I’ve been able to draw on my own experience of caring for Mum. I know that conversations can be very weird when you sit with someone with dementia. You learn to just go with the flow. Mum used to tell me things like she was going to Australia and ask if I wanted to come. When she was first diagnosed, it was devastating, but now as a family we’ve moved to a place of acceptance. Mum is very content. She doesn’t worry about anything.

I’ve also learnt a lot through The Way We Care training. At its heart, it’s about getting to know each person. If someone is distressed, I might suggest that we have a cup of tea. If you can get the conversation onto something you know they might like to talk about, you can help them to move on.

As a family, we all moved to Fernhurst in West Sussex in 2017. My daughter and her husband had been living in London but didn’t want to bring up their boys there. We’re very close as a family, and so my husband and I decided to move from our home in Kent too, together with my mum, Sheila, and my aunty.

My mum is living with dementia. As the condition progressed, it became clear that I couldn’t keep caring for her myself. She wanted to come to a Christian home and that’s when we found Shottermill House. Mum moved in about six years ago.

I started volunteering at Shottermill House during Covid. With all the visiting restrictions, this was a lovely way I could continue to see Mum, as well as get to know all the other members of the home.

One day I was asked if I’d consider taking on the role of Hummingbird. I love being with people and so I decided to give it a go.

As a Hummingbird, I get alongside family members, particularly those living with dementia. I’ll hold someone’s hand when they are sad. Sometimes it’s not about talking, it’s about being there and giving them a stroke and saying, “It’s going to be okay”.

I’ve been able to draw on my own experience of caring for Mum. I know that conversations can be very weird when you sit with someone with dementia. You learn to just go with the flow. Mum used to tell me things like she was going to Australia and ask if I wanted to come. When she was first diagnosed, it was devastating, but now as a family we’ve moved to a place of acceptance. Mum is very content. She doesn’t worry about anything.

I’ve also learnt a lot through The Way We Care training. At its heart, it’s about getting to know each person. If someone is distressed, I might suggest that we have a cup of tea. If you can get the conversation onto something you know they might like to talk about, you can help them to move on.

There’s a wonderful, caring atmosphere across the whole home. From the kitchen staff, to the housekeepers to carers and management, everyone is committed to putting the family members first. It’s one big happy family.

I get a good feeling when I come here. I come away thinking, “I’ve really enjoyed today.” I love making a difference. Everyone here is so lovely – I love them all. It’s a privilege to be here.

In her spare time, Susan likes to:
• Take part in a weekly keep fit class and a weekly Pilates session
• Look after her two grandsons when her daughter/ son-in-law are busy working
• Go on walks in the countryside, often with her daughter’s two dogs